I have been MIA for some time now so thought I would swing in really quick and do a post. I have been extremely busy with school, BIO 168 (A&P I) trying to prepare for the final and the completion of the end of the semester. Things begin to get crazy when the end of the semester is approaching. Not only do you have to apply all of your time into studying for the last couple of tests, but you also have to study for the final at the same time, not to mention I have 2 case studies due which I'm hoping to complete by the end of the weekend. I registered today for my BIO 169 (A&P II) and BIO 275 (Microbiology). I still need to take the math placement and my hopes are that I place high enough to only have to take one math class. That would be 3 classes for the Spring semester and then I will have all of my pre-reqs out of the way. That is the goal I'm pushing for. It is hard but it isn't impossible. I study non stop and hardly have a minute to myself. When I do, the last thing I want to do is type so that's why I haven't been on much lately.
This time of year is extremely busy anyways with the holidays coming up. I LOVE Christmas so I've been trying to do some Christmas planning amongst everything else that is on my plate. My husband just had wrist surgery on Nov. 5th. His Scaphoid bone was basically crushed so they had to do a bone graft and put a screw in his wrist. This has also added additional responsibility to my plate. I have managed to make time for a break here and there and some really good friends of mine. I am going to the fabric store w/ my friend Sheila on Thursday and Friday I'm going w/ Alley to pick out pjs for our boys on the train ride Nov. 22nd. Tonight I got to see my long lost BFF, Shayla. She is so much like me. It has been forever since I've seen her and I was so happy to get to spend some time with her. Shayla and I are so much alike it isn't even funny. We laugh at all the same things and find some of the silliest things so funny we have tears in our eyes. It was like that tonight. We like to joke around and have the same sense of humor. I like all of our inside jokes that most just wouldn't understand. She is more like my sister and my friend. I met her at the health-source company I use to work with. We bonded immediately and became very close. When my son was smaller, she came to my house and he kept turning her head to look at this candle. To this day we still laugh about that and still have no idea why he kept doing that. She knows all of my darkest secrets and everything about me that would be embarrassing to tell anyone else. I am myself 100% around her and she accepts that. We can act a fool around each other and instead of judging, we just laugh! It's so funny. We were laughing tonight and her face was turning red and I had tears in my eyes just from laughing. I have to say that she is the only person I've ever felt like that around, like she is my family. She has always stood by my side through the darkest of times and made me laugh when I just didn't feel like laughing. It has been forever since I've seen her so I'm glad we finally had the time to get together. Our friendship took a turn a few years back but it didn't matter because I knew we had a special friendship that could go through a rough patch and still be ok. We did go through the rough patch but even through that, we kept in touch as much as we could and tried to make sure the other knew what was going on in our lives that was making these changes. It didn't matter even with the changes because I knew if I ever needed her, she would be there, same as if she needed me. I truly have missed her. I've had several friends and friends that I adore, but there is something so much different about the friendship w /me and Shayla. It is so special and one that I will always cherish. It made me so happy to laugh tonight and especially with her. We look like dorks when we laugh so hard, but we don't care, we just laugh even harder. We are that stupid funny! LOL....I remember the good ole days when I practically lived at her house. I would visit and stay overnight and we slept in her bed. LOL...She had a side she slept best on and I slept against the wall. It was like a slumber party..haha but that's what I mean about everything being so comfortable. I don't believe I've ever found that in anyone except for my husband and son, that person to just be yourself with. Anyways, tonight was just a good night and I'm so grateful to have seen my best friend.
Other than that, not too much has been going on. Oh, on the baby news, nothing yet. We tried all of October but nothing. I do know that I was bluesy when my visitor came and when my visitor left. It made me wonder if I did conceive and lost another baby. The thought crossed my mind but I'm not totally sure. We are still trying but I'm torn between school and a baby. I want another baby so bad, but I also want to be a nurse. I have a healthy son, a happy child that seems to be all I need. I'm not sure if taking on a baby will be the best interest for me. I would absolutely love it if I got pregnant and had another child, however, that would also hold off nursing school. I'm not sure if I want that sacrifice. There are so many days where I'm perfectly content with all that I have and wouldn't want it any other way, and there are days where I feel sorry for Tommy being the only child. I want him to have a sibling so then it makes me wonder, am I wanting another child for myself, or for him? Don't get me wrong, I would love to have another child and would love that baby so much. I just have been going through different emotions about it lately. I keep thinking about all the sleep I get now and how starting over would be so hard. Tommy never slept in the beginning and it was so hard on us. I can't imagine having a baby and trying to balance nursing school. I suppose we will cross that bridge if it ever happens. I'm at the point now that if it doesn't, I'm fine with that. There is also a teacher at Tommy's school that is due to have her baby any day now. She is so ultra sweet and has said she would love to have my help with her new little one. That may be the baby dose that I need. :-) On another note, hardly anyone knows we have been trying. I just chose to keep it that way because it really isn't any of their business unless I chose to involve them. Most of my friends/family don't even know I have this blog so they won't find out on here either. It just isn't something I care to share with anyone since most can't understand what I go through when trying let alone through a loss. It is something I chose to keep somewhat private between very few. That is all the baby making news I have for now. I won't know more til the end of November, early December.
Well I'm exhausted so this is about all I feel like typing for the night. I'll try and post more sooner than later.
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